Morning With the Masters of Distraction

(It is Monday morning again at the Hoytstead. Today, two boys will go to work as being distracted as never before in our country's history.)

"Stop playing with Legos and eat."

*two minutes*

"I can hear the Legos clinking...finish your breakfast!"

*glances over from kitchen*

"Put the book away and eat."

"You've had how many bagels ?"

*in living room*

"No, you cannot go get the mail...you're not dressed."

"I can get dressed...it's my turn to get the mail!"

"I know you can get dressed, but you're not dressed now. You can get the mail tomorrow. If you're dressed."

*two minutes*

"Mommy...Nolan has been taking pictures with the Lego camera all morning and when I asked him for a turn he just gave me this copy that he made from Legos..."

"I'll take of that..and that. They're both staying on my desk 'til after school."

*one minute*

"hey Mommy...you know that sore finger I had? It wasn't a fingernail that was cut too short. It had pus! And I just cut it away with the fingernail clippers!"

"Oh...OK."

"It's a cavern!"

"Yeah. Better go wash that off under the faucet."

*three minutes*

"Stop talking in there and do your math."

"My mechanical pencil ran out of lead. I can't do school."

"Well, if your mechanical pencil's run out of lead, you'll just have to use a real pencil."

"And 'no,' I am not going to go get you the pencil."

*one minute*

"Trevor...you need to do the dishes after you finish that math problem. It can't wait until after you finish all your math."

*five minutes*

"Mommy? He's doing more math problems. I thought you wanted him to do the dishes after finishing that one problem?"

"But I thought you wanted me to finish all my math, first..."

"Both of you...go get dressed. We're already behind time."

*one minute*

"Mommy? Trevor won't let me into the room...he says he has to get dressed..."

"Trevor? KNOCK IT OFF!"

"Mommy? He still won't let me in...."

"Trevor? Did you hear what I said?"

"I thought you wanted me to get dressed?"
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Don't tell me I'm gonna miss this, some day. 'Cause I'm not.
 

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