The Progeny
Things to Make You Feel Bad
Having that "Back in School" dream. Again. Only this time it wasn't college but high school.
But that wasn't the worst of it. One of my nephews was my teacher. My GYM teacher, no less. (yes, that's what we called Phys Ed back then...and suddenly all those locker room smells are coming back...)
Not sure how I did in the class because I spent my ENTIRE DREAM TIME lost in the building, looking for the restroom.
I think there are some obvious lessons we can learn from this dream:
1) Young whippersnappers should never be in charge of their elders
2) They just don't make buildings with enough restrooms for women
3) Ma is obviously suffering from post-traumatic stress syndrome from her school days
But let's face it...dreams are not terribly meaningful. They're just your brain's way of making you look stupid while you sleep.
Let's move on to truly important things, like how one should dress for the Family Research Council Value Voters Summit.
Thanks to Paul Bedard's "Washington Whipers" in U.S. News & World Report for this little nugget:
This is the advice from a political support blog for Huckabee, specifically, this post.
It's not my intention to promote or not promote anyone for president (at least not at this time, though my present disinclination to advance/not advance any one candidate does not preclude the possibility of such activity in the future, should I feel/not feel like it) but I would rather draw attention to the last notation:
Of course the town "Mrs. Smith" is referring to is Washington D.C. But don't worry, even though "Mrs. Smith" moved to the capitol city and went to law school, she married a public school teacher which "keeps her connected to Main Street." (see her sidebar, "A Lobbyist For Main Street?!?)
But as a janitor, nay, even a professional janitor, I take umbrage...oh yes, I take GREAT umbrage to the smear upon my name.
I resent being linked in the same sentence to "20-somethings going to clubs."
We janitors are a respectable lot and if I want to wear perfume to church on Sunday then I jolly well will wear perfume to church on Sunday.
After all, I'm around me more than anyone else and a discreet squirt of Vanilla Fields could mean the difference between a returned smile or the sudden clunk-over of someone due to an unfortunate deodorant malfunction on my part.
LIVES could be at stake.
But let us not limit ourselves to the whims of Ma's personal feelings. Let's get down to the nitty-gritty of what words mean.
The word "janitor" comes from a noble Latin background. Let us examine the history behind the word:
Word History: A holiday for janitors ought to take place in January, for both words are linked. In Latin iānus was the word for "archway, gateway, or covered passage" and also for the god of gates, doorways, and beginnings in general. As many schoolchildren know, our month January—a month of beginnings—is named for the god. Latin iānitor, the source of our word janitor and ultimately also from iānus, meant "doorkeeper or gatekeeper." Probably because iānitor was common in Latin records and documents, it was adopted into English, first being recorded in the sense "doorkeeper" around 1567 in a Scots text. In an early quotation Saint Peter is called "the Janitor of heaven." The term can still mean "doorkeeper," but in Scots usage janitor also referred to a minor school official. Apparently this position at times involved maintenance duties and doorkeeping, and the maintenance duties took over the more exalted tasks, giving us the position of janitor as we know it today.
Hmmm. Saint Peter is called "the Janitor of heaven." I kinda like that.
While it might be that "Mrs. Smith" intended no slur on janitors per se, it does seem clear that she was attempting to make unfavorable comparisons and one would certainly hope that she does appreciate the folks who dump her Evian empties out of her waste basket and sweep up after hours so that her professional looking suits--in colors, solids and patterns--don't acquire any très gauche grit.
But it does my heart good to know that "Mrs. Smith" has been hanging out with janitors, otherwise how would she have the precise knowledge to make said comparison?
So here's to the high powered lobbyists who spring from the countryside and gallantly brave the professional world of Washington so as to speak for the values of us poor hicks...er, I mean Americans.
And thanks for remaining your sweet simple selves.
Tweet
But that wasn't the worst of it. One of my nephews was my teacher. My GYM teacher, no less. (yes, that's what we called Phys Ed back then...and suddenly all those locker room smells are coming back...)
Not sure how I did in the class because I spent my ENTIRE DREAM TIME lost in the building, looking for the restroom.
I think there are some obvious lessons we can learn from this dream:
1) Young whippersnappers should never be in charge of their elders
2) They just don't make buildings with enough restrooms for women
3) Ma is obviously suffering from post-traumatic stress syndrome from her school days
But let's face it...dreams are not terribly meaningful. They're just your brain's way of making you look stupid while you sleep.
Let's move on to truly important things, like how one should dress for the Family Research Council Value Voters Summit.
Thanks to Paul Bedard's "Washington Whipers" in U.S. News & World Report for this little nugget:
---- Men: Khakis, button-down shirt and sport jackets are a great look. Black/navy/dark gray suits give you a professional-looking edge. At the very least wear a long sleeve solid color button-down shirt.
---- Women: Anything professional-looking will work for ladies--suits, skirts, nice pants, colors, solids, patterns. Just keep it modest--don't commit a Jeri Thompson-esq faux pas by dressing for Hollywood or Miami.
---- Both: Scent is not a part of dressing professionally. In this town, janitors and 20-somethings going to clubs wear cologne and perfume; professionals do not.
This is the advice from a political support blog for Huckabee, specifically, this post.
It's not my intention to promote or not promote anyone for president (at least not at this time, though my present disinclination to advance/not advance any one candidate does not preclude the possibility of such activity in the future, should I feel/not feel like it) but I would rather draw attention to the last notation:
Scent is not a part of dressing professionally. In this town, janitors and 20-somethings going to clubs wear cologne and perfume; professionals do not.
Of course the town "Mrs. Smith" is referring to is Washington D.C. But don't worry, even though "Mrs. Smith" moved to the capitol city and went to law school, she married a public school teacher which "keeps her connected to Main Street." (see her sidebar, "A Lobbyist For Main Street?!?)
But as a janitor, nay, even a professional janitor, I take umbrage...oh yes, I take GREAT umbrage to the smear upon my name.
I resent being linked in the same sentence to "20-somethings going to clubs."
We janitors are a respectable lot and if I want to wear perfume to church on Sunday then I jolly well will wear perfume to church on Sunday.
After all, I'm around me more than anyone else and a discreet squirt of Vanilla Fields could mean the difference between a returned smile or the sudden clunk-over of someone due to an unfortunate deodorant malfunction on my part.
LIVES could be at stake.
But let us not limit ourselves to the whims of Ma's personal feelings. Let's get down to the nitty-gritty of what words mean.
The word "janitor" comes from a noble Latin background. Let us examine the history behind the word:
Word History: A holiday for janitors ought to take place in January, for both words are linked. In Latin iānus was the word for "archway, gateway, or covered passage" and also for the god of gates, doorways, and beginnings in general. As many schoolchildren know, our month January—a month of beginnings—is named for the god. Latin iānitor, the source of our word janitor and ultimately also from iānus, meant "doorkeeper or gatekeeper." Probably because iānitor was common in Latin records and documents, it was adopted into English, first being recorded in the sense "doorkeeper" around 1567 in a Scots text. In an early quotation Saint Peter is called "the Janitor of heaven." The term can still mean "doorkeeper," but in Scots usage janitor also referred to a minor school official. Apparently this position at times involved maintenance duties and doorkeeping, and the maintenance duties took over the more exalted tasks, giving us the position of janitor as we know it today.
Hmmm. Saint Peter is called "the Janitor of heaven." I kinda like that.
While it might be that "Mrs. Smith" intended no slur on janitors per se, it does seem clear that she was attempting to make unfavorable comparisons and one would certainly hope that she does appreciate the folks who dump her Evian empties out of her waste basket and sweep up after hours so that her professional looking suits--in colors, solids and patterns--don't acquire any très gauche grit.
But it does my heart good to know that "Mrs. Smith" has been hanging out with janitors, otherwise how would she have the precise knowledge to make said comparison?
So here's to the high powered lobbyists who spring from the countryside and gallantly brave the professional world of Washington so as to speak for the values of us poor hicks...er, I mean Americans.
And thanks for remaining your sweet simple selves.
Tweet
posted by Ma Hoyt | 10:58 AM
4 Comments:
While I myself do not have allergies (at least none I'm aware of), I have given up the use of perfume (even my favorite for which I have received many compliments) in most situations at the behest of my organizational colleagues who are looking out for those colleagues who do have allergies. Unfortunately, it is sometimes those who "bathe" in the floral essences who continue to offend (I am not saying that you have committed such offense--I've not been close enough to you to know). I am surprised that someone who is so very sensitive to the idea of a healthful environment and resentful of those carrying communicable diseases would be so adamant about wearing perfume which may annoy but more importantly may distress those who are afflicted with allergies. Of course, given all that, we as a society will have to become more tolerant of people who smell like people--even people who have worked up a sweat.
I had thought of the allergy angle and forgot to address it in the blogpost.
And if the person suggesting appropriate attire, etc. had mentioned that colognes and perfumes should not be used because of others' potential allergies, then it all would have made sense.
It was the whole "only lame/uncool/silly people like janitors and 20-somethings going to clubs" aspect that got my goat.
That person was implying that janitors (for one) were some lower life form that do not generate respect.
Granted I overreact in some instances (as I am now :-) and I hope you know I do that for effect, to a certain extent.
I would never intentionally wear something that annoyed or afflicted people adversely.
In reality, I only wear perfume maybe once a week. And when this bottle runs out I may well not buy another.
But seeing as I am the janitor for the church next door to us I got a little miffed at her implication.
And I would also like to point out that I have an aversion to black velvet paintings...
:-D
I love your assembly line, I bet it was delicious. I found your blog through Sharon (the younger, I think she said...anyway the one who lives in PA)
Hi there, Kay in PA :-)
And say hello to my sister-in-law, Sharon Kay, who also lives in PA.
(this could get confusing)
I love your Wordless Wednesday pictures! (and am slightly jealous if you live that close to the beach)
I'm also going to try one of your lunch suggestions (mini-pizza English muffins with sauce and cheese) as I'm sure my family is getting pretty tired of the same old drivel I offer them at noon...
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