The Progeny
The Fat Report: Day 12
Finally, FINALLY I do believe there is progress to report. It is just barely possible, though not official, that I have lost a pound or two. And I didn't even have to employ my nifty "recalibration of the scales," technique.
And that brings to mind something I have wanted to share for awhile:
"Ma's Methodology of Weight Monitoring."
-always weigh in the morning
-after using the potty
-sans vêtements (as in, clothes)
And for best results:
-remove watch
-spit as much saliva as possible into sink,
-exhale
(shaving of head is optional)
Sanity Watch: Considering I have not had one morsel of chocolate since Sunday night, I am exhibiting amazing lucidity and emotional restraint. In other words, I am no more spacey or crabby than usual.
I can honestly say that not even one speck of that heavenly byproduct of the cacao bean has crossed my lips. There was a close call on Wednesday, when in a moment of serotonic deprivation, I absent-mindedly picked up some crumbs from an empty pan of chocolate chip cookie bars. But, at the very last moment, I came to my senses and, with horror, cast them down.
Today was the weekly shopping trip, and I made several purchases as experiments in the area of weight loss.
-low carb protein bars *gasps and rushes to look at box* "ARRRRRRRRGGGHHHHH!" I forgot they had a thin coating of chocolate on the outside....*pounds head in frustration*
Well, OK. A minor faux-pas. But I have otherwise closely adhered to my self-imposed week-long denial of chocolate and desserts. (and I thought I was being so good....*sobs quietly*)
-extra veggies and fruits
-low-fat dressing (I'm not touching that fat-free stuff. I've tried that and it's gross)
-1% milk, for Loren and myself, since it seems we need to lower our collective cholesterols (I seriously doubt that we can make the jump to skim. There are just some things no person should have to face.
-a can of Red Bull (sugar free) "With taurine. Vitalizes body and mind."
How shall I describe the taste of Red Bull? Hmmm, well, it reminded me of a couple of fermented fruits that lost their way enroute to the garbage disposal. I tried, but could not drink more than half the 8.3 ounces. Those 8.3 ounces being lightly carbonated, to ensure that you taste it again, and again.... The protein bar, while somewhat lacking in flavor, at least had the presence of mind not to revisit one in such an effervescent manner. Perhaps the "stars" drink Red Bull to keep up their energy and lose weight, but my mind and body shall just have to "make do" with less vitalization.
*sigh* only 3 more days till I.....can.......have.........chocolate...............*clunk* Tweet
And that brings to mind something I have wanted to share for awhile:
"Ma's Methodology of Weight Monitoring."
-always weigh in the morning
-after using the potty
-sans vêtements (as in, clothes)
And for best results:
-remove watch
-spit as much saliva as possible into sink,
-exhale
(shaving of head is optional)
Sanity Watch: Considering I have not had one morsel of chocolate since Sunday night, I am exhibiting amazing lucidity and emotional restraint. In other words, I am no more spacey or crabby than usual.
I can honestly say that not even one speck of that heavenly byproduct of the cacao bean has crossed my lips. There was a close call on Wednesday, when in a moment of serotonic deprivation, I absent-mindedly picked up some crumbs from an empty pan of chocolate chip cookie bars. But, at the very last moment, I came to my senses and, with horror, cast them down.
Today was the weekly shopping trip, and I made several purchases as experiments in the area of weight loss.
-low carb protein bars *gasps and rushes to look at box* "ARRRRRRRRGGGHHHHH!" I forgot they had a thin coating of chocolate on the outside....*pounds head in frustration*
Well, OK. A minor faux-pas. But I have otherwise closely adhered to my self-imposed week-long denial of chocolate and desserts. (and I thought I was being so good....*sobs quietly*)
-extra veggies and fruits
-low-fat dressing (I'm not touching that fat-free stuff. I've tried that and it's gross)
-1% milk, for Loren and myself, since it seems we need to lower our collective cholesterols (I seriously doubt that we can make the jump to skim. There are just some things no person should have to face.
-a can of Red Bull (sugar free) "With taurine. Vitalizes body and mind."
How shall I describe the taste of Red Bull? Hmmm, well, it reminded me of a couple of fermented fruits that lost their way enroute to the garbage disposal. I tried, but could not drink more than half the 8.3 ounces. Those 8.3 ounces being lightly carbonated, to ensure that you taste it again, and again.... The protein bar, while somewhat lacking in flavor, at least had the presence of mind not to revisit one in such an effervescent manner. Perhaps the "stars" drink Red Bull to keep up their energy and lose weight, but my mind and body shall just have to "make do" with less vitalization.
*sigh* only 3 more days till I.....can.......have.........chocolate...............*clunk* Tweet
posted by Ma Hoyt | 5:30 PM
1 Comments:
There is always the solution to weight loss of helping the scale say what you want it to. Take the scale apart so that you can place a small amount of silicone rubber just past where the limit should be. Let dry and then put scale back together....step on and the little dial things cant go any furthur than the silicone rubber stopper....Or you can just stop eating...chocolate or anything for that matter. If you try the latter way though you might not make it to the graduation.
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