The Cement Caper...Day 3

(this took place yesterday afternoon)

Loren knew the cement truck wouldn't reach to the back of the garage, so he made two nifty chutes (one long, one short) to facilitate matters.

Did I marry a handy man, or what :-D

Everyone waits with bated breath as the cement guy adds extensions to his truck chute.


Here it comes...


Oops...a slight miscalculation. That big glob of cement that plopped into the wrong square had to be shoveled over by hand. The chute was readjusted and with two people holding implements alongside it went better.


For the corner square, the cement truck went around the back of the garage and stuck the chute in one of the windows.


Hafta wash off things off every so often.
Ah...the happy glint of sun on a wet screeding board. If only Jason and Kendra had been at home, I would have gladly done this job the entire time.

Our first block was nicely screeded, than somebody stepped in it, accidentally. Then he did it AGAIN.
I lost all moral superiority though, after I stepped in one of the smaller wet squares. Twice.

At this point, someone in their late forties temporarily lost control and was heard to remark, "I HATE THIS!"

(psychologists call this 'transparency.' Christians might call it that, especially if you said you were sorry. I call it 'finding my inner Ma.')

Loren rigged up a neat screeding platform for Ethan to get along the back edge and corner. I was positioned on the front--when not taking pictures.
There was some extra cement at the end so we had the guy just dump it into this last block. Then it had to be shoveled and carted over to another place in the wheel barrow.

(How's that atrial fibrillation workin' for ya, Derek?")

A once in a lifetime experience...Nolan gets to use the hose and not be in trouble.


These pants used to be intact. Then sometime during the afternoon a small weak spot started to tear...and tear...
....leaving me kneeling on bare cement. ("OOooo, this is not gonna be good...")

Loren putting on the edge finish to the last square of the day.
I took this in part to illustrate how slanted my end of the screeding was, but you can't really tell. Loren said it didn't matter :-)

It only hurts when I move or something touches them. You should have seen the clear plasma-like fluid running off last night.
Lotsa fun washing off the bits of cement and scraps of jean fabric from those babies.

Other than seeing the need for Botox injections around the patella, I've offered my name to the local diocese for their next building project..."Our Lady of the Weeping Knees Chapel."

Or maybe I'll just write a book about it, "Scars of the Screeder."

He may be smiling, but what is this man thinking ? Here's a good guess...("I should never had bought that woman a camera.)

Loren's spent all day removing the last 9 wooden forms. The skill saw has to make cuts between every piece of rebar. It's excruciatingly slow work but by 6:30 this evening he "only" had 1 1/2 sides to go.

Ah then...tomorrow will come soon enough.
 

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So....

...I was going to post pictures of the cement work yesterday, but Blogger is having issues so for the time being you'll just have to content yourself with this which I saw on Kay in PA's blog.



 

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The News

Derek has indeed converted out of a-fib and so the cardioversion has been canceled. (very good news :-) He still has to stay on the Coumadin in case his heart goes back and forth again.
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I neglected to mention that daughter Sharon has been retained for another three months at her temporary post at DePuy in Warsaw.

She was the only temp person in her group that was held on and that doesn't surprise me since she is one of my smart cookies and of course, I taught her all I know ;-)
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Iowa makes the national news a-gain, with its tax on pumpkins, proving that the Hawkeye state remains on the cutting edge of important governmental economic policy decisions.

(I know I'd enjoy filling out a tax exemption form were I buying a pumpkin)

And now, something I've been dreaming of all morning....a nap.
 

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Cement Hangover

As we drag ourselves lethargically around the house we pause every so often to collect our thoughts and try and figure out why we paused in the first place.

I'll have pictures up sometime....maybe.

Yesterday was the hardest ever but it is done and we only have one more round to fight with the evil-cement-mixture-of-doom.
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On the Derek front, Ma is basically going bananas...or would be if she had the energy.

After several calls back and forth with doctors it's was decided to try for a cardioversion. The only trouble is, next week are the ITED's for Derek and Melinda at the high school.

Not having the schedule I phoned and discovered that they are doing the testing all on one day this year (at last, some sanity) and that would give us 4 extra options for cardioversion scheduling.

THEN Dr. P. called back and said she was able to schedule it for this Friday, which is good!

Told Loren. "Okay, that means we'll have to have the last cement load on Thursday..."

*groan*

If the cement truck comes again tomorrow, Loren will have to hop like a bunny to get all the wooden forms taken off.

THEN, Derek came up to me and said, "Can you listen to my heart? It seems regular again..."

*blinks*

IT WAS!

So now we head to the local clinic for a 12-lead EKG to confirm and we will see what happens.

The Hoyt Saga continues...
 

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Trevorism

 
"Look! It's maganized !"

Maganism: the properties of attraction possessed by apples

(click to enlarge picture of magaized apple)
 

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Ma's Newsy Nuggets

All Iowa news this time.
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Proof that hunters should train their dogs in gun safety.

What's nearly as strange...I had to find this on the BBC website.
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Iowa has one of the lowest high school dropout rates!

Important data for all you teachers--of which there must be legions--planning to move to Iowa.
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If you're like me, you don't always get your news from the major networks anymore. But when I do, it's usually NBC. I had to find out from TV Newser that Jim Cummins had passed away.

Jim was from Iowa.

I realize there is one word that in that article that could be considered objectionable by some, but given the context of its use, I don't think it particularly offensive.

Ah well, off to the day...
 

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What to do?

...when you wake up just after 4 in the morning and that little switch clicks inside that says, "Honey? You are not a-goin' back to sleep...mnh, mnh, mnh."

Well, you wait for a chance to slip outta of bed without waking the hubby, creep downstairs and offload the pictures from last night's Army Jazz Band concert :-)

Now there's nothing else to do but hear miscellaneous mice scurrying around, wait for the kids to get up, wait for the doctor to call, do the school routine, and wait for the cement truck to come this afternoon.

ANYWAY....

...here we see Alina Severs making her dad, Doug, laugh. Those Severs are always laughing.
Alina made it up from Des Moines despite a chemical fire earlier in the day that had shut down I-35 and Route 80 for a time.

Most of the gang, sedately waiting. Down at the end are Alina, Ella and Dee Severs.
Nolan and Trevor are being their usual squirrelly selves.

There's Jay Kepple on the right. It was his wife Eileen that heard about and procured the free tickets for us. Guess I missed her in the picture...sorry Eileen :-(
Then comes Gerry and Jo Craig, some of their friends and waaayyyy down is Miss Violet. I haven't asked her what she thought of the jazz band, yet...

{a closer look at the last pic shows Eileen right next to Violet}

Some of the band warming up. Drummers always wear earphones so they won't be distracted by euphonious sounds coming from the other musicians.
Okay...he took them off for the concert...

Trevor and Nolan demonstrate how to balance on seats that are folded up.


One of the trumpet players had a birthday, so the vocalist is presenting him with a cake while the band leader has everyone sing "Happy Birthday."


Three of the musicians came out during the Dixieland numbers and played their way through the auditorium. Fun stuff :-)



Towards the end of the concert the group played themes from all five branches of the armed service and invited veterans to stand up, to whom the band leader saluted.
This was the army part, so Loren was standing up beside me.

We had an excellent time, though the two little boys thought it was a bit long ;-)

I was telling Loren as we got ready for bed last night, "Just think, when all the kids have left home, we can go around to all kinds of concerts!"

"Yeah, I'll be 75 and you'll be 68."

It took me a while to do the mental calculations, but I had to correct him...."No no. You'll be 69 and I'll only be 62 !"

(a vast world of difference, don't you think?)
 

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Soooo close....

It's going to be an interesting day.

Thanks to Eileen Kepple, our whole family will be going to Iowa Falls this evening with free tickets to the Army Jazz Band!

This is the group based out of Washington D.C. and not some lesser known localized outfit.

It's gonna be great :-)

Just have to get the grocery shopping done and school and make sure the bread gets made and someone does their laundry...

In slightly less happy tidings, I came down to breakfast and and Derek greeted me with, "Bad news. My heart's back in A-fib."

BUMMER.

We were within a day or two of him being cleared to get off the Coumadin. He's been doing SO WELL and had gotten through the magic 6 months post-cardioversion and stayed "normal."

I suppose the doc will want to do something....
 

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Red-breasted Nuthatch

 


Fellow avian compadre Melinda drew my attention to the bird feeder, identifying this Red-breasted Nuthatch from her bird book.

He comes frequently but doesn't stick around long. After picking out a seed--sunflower in this instance--he takes it off to nearby Swing Tree, sticks it in the bark and then cracks the seed open to eat it.

Very clever!

I turned my camera on, extended the zoom, focused on the bird feeder and waited. It took a couple of tries but he finally perched on the side instead of the back for a second, showing himself in all his focused glory.

Hot doggies :-D

Melinda and I figure it has migrated down here from Canada for the winter.

I suppose nobody else cares, but we think he is most cool :-)
 

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Farmer Frey Visits Treasure Galaxay's Age of Empires

Stumbling down the stairway Friday morning, I found Nolan and Trevor busy with the Legos...

MA: "Ahh...I see you guys are up already..."

TREVOR: "Yes. Wewoh doing a Fahm and Space Stoh-wee!"

*blinks*



NOLAN: "Okay...*leaning over notepaper and scribbling furiously*...you have 1000 points....I have 2000."

(why am I not surprised)

*sounds of LASER BLASTS*

NOLAN: "Now...you can bring the combine up here..."

"Ka-POW! Ka-POW! Ka-POW!!"

TREVOR: "OK. What did I get?"

*more frenzied pencil scribbling*

NOLAN: "You got....that much food....that much wood.....that much stone."

NOLAN: "Now, this guy has to find the secret treasure...this is his crystal."

TREVOR: "And he did his field...heeeewoh...."
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Will Farmer Frey get his space fields harvested in time?

Will the spaceman find the magic crystal before the laser-blasting combine gets him?

The answer is out there....some- whewoh....
 

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Revelation

Age 49 is probably not a good time to start a career in construction.

I say this unequivocally after working parts of two different days screeding cement. And not only do I NOT desire this as a mid-life career move, but I'm wondering if anyone would mind terribly if I just crawled into bed and stayed there until March.

Late March.

Of 2010.

But at least the garage floor is halfway done.
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Hols of the Day

National Mincemeat Day (ugh)

Mule Day (conflict of dates....some sites claim April, some September...the controversy rages on)

And on one historical site I found a US holiday: Frances E. Willard Day (Temperance Day)

This was interesting to me because my mother has been involved in the WCTU for a number of years, and Frances Willard was the founder of that organization.

Now comes the tricky part. The part where I mention a certain word and run the very real risk of having any number of people keel over and die of shock. That word is, "feminism."

As in any movement, there is always the potential for good causes to be overshadowed by weird and off-the-wall people.

Frances was not one of those people. She was a modest woman who stood up for the family unit, encouraging women to dress like women, but also fighting for conditions that could only help their families.

Looking back, even though the word hadn't been coined yet, she was a feminist. She thought it might be nice if certain men didn't drink up most of their paycheck before coming home to the family at the end of the week. That way, certain children got to eat a little more and certain wives were beat a little less.

So in fighting for prohibition, Frances Willard was fighting for both economic justice and physical safety for the family.

Don't ask me to call that kind of feminism a bad thing.

Oh but there's more.

Frances also fought for women's suffrage or more simply, the right to vote.

There were a few other important tidbits, like changing the age of consent in some 20 states where it was set at 10 years of age, or trying to persuade governments to get out of the business of trafficking in narcotics.

(you have to wonder what some of the male legislators were thinking by approving those laws...)

I found a good article here that has a fair amount of biographical information.

Even though I do not entertain every conviction that Miss Willard held, there were many initiatives from this early "feminist" that were quite pro-family. To the extent that it might be time for Christians to better define what is meant by "feminism" today.

It actually could mean having a feminine character. Or it could mean advocating for equal social, economic, political etc. rights with men. Feminism could mean a lot of things.

There are surely many of the above causes that both men and women could support without compromising their beliefs, whether they be quite "liberal" or quite "conservative." (two more broad-brush labels that could use redefining or possibly even obliteration)

Well...best get off this tangent for today. Except, first a hearty "Hi Mom!" to my own mother who attended WCTU activities this year at age 89....*waves towards Indiana*...Way to go, Mom :-D

This Day in History:

--1825 Erie Canal between Hudson River & Lake Erie opened
--1863 Worldwide Red Cross organized in Geneva (the Red Cross emblem is the exact inversion of the Swiss flag, which is a white cross on a red field)
--1881 Shootout at the OK corral, in Tombstone, Az
--1949 Pres Truman increases minimum wage from 40¢ to 75¢
--1970 "Doonesbury" comic strip debuts in 28 newspapers (sorry, but I just love this comic strip...and that should start a few prayers on my behalf)
--1984 "Baby Fae" gets baboon heart transplant, lives 21 days
--1988 Donald Trump bills Mike Tyson $2,000,000 for 4 month advisory service

Ma's quote of the day, which also happens to be an historical event...

1769
Women have limited property rights
The colonies adopt the English system of property ownership for married women as stated by
Judge John Wilford Blackstone:

“By marriage, the husband and wife are one person in the law. The very being and legal existence of the woman is suspended during the marriage, or at least is incorporated into that of her husband under whose wing and protection she performs everything.” As a result women cannot own property in their own name nor keep their own earnings.

 

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The Second Day of Cement Excitement

OK. We are DEAD tired.

The cement truck was scheduled to come at 2 but then we found out it might be an hour early, so my nicely planned lunch of English muffin pizzas went back in the freezer and out came the peanut butter and jelly.

We knew more of what we were doing this time but honestly, I was so busy I didn't take any pictures until I was through screeding the last of three large sections.

I am going to be seeing a two-by-four going back and forth over wet cement in my sleep.

But Loren is the one to feel sorry for. He didn't get his puny PBJ sandwich until 4 and he is still out there working.

We had to move the bikes and two vehicles from behing the garage and park them over by the little fruit trees.
That was so the cement truck could come over and put the chute in through the side garage door to get at one of the squares.

My picture doesn't illustrate this very well, but Loren is going around each square with a special edging tool to give it a nice finished look.


Much of the hectic work is over and now for a few details. "Mommy," said Ethan, "sweeping is very artistic work."


Loren surveys his edge work while Ethan keeps workin' on his art.
If you look at the section by the side door (in back of Lorn) you might see a little smear in the cement. That was my attempt to fix up a tiny place with my fingers after we'd been over that with the screed board twice. With a car parked over it, who's gonna know?

Time to kick up one's heels!
(yeah, if only I had the energy...)


My bonny little, blond bunny boy
 

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National Chemistry Week!

It is.

I visited the American Chemical Society's web page and folks...did you know they have a mission for National Chemistry Week?

The mission of National Chemistry Week is to reach the public, particularly elementary and secondary school children, with positive messages about chemistry to:

* Make a positive change in the public's impression of chemistry; (emphasis mine :-)
* Promote a mechanism for effectively mobilizing ACS local sections; and
* Motivate the ACS membership through local section activities.

This year's theme:

"The Many Faces of Chemistry."

Particularly appropo if one's been doing experiments of an explosive nature. (ha ha, Ma is just kidding :-)

And just so's you can prepare for the next two years, here's a "heads up" on future themes:

October 19 – 25, 2008
Theme: “Having a Ball with Chemistry”
(The Chemistry of Sports)
October 18 – 24, 2009
Theme: “Chemistry—It’s Elemental!”

Be sure and mark it on your calendars....now.

On to today, which is:

National Young Women's Day of Action (c'mon sisters, lets get out there and...um....act)
Punk for a Day (NOT)
World Pasta Day
National Denim Day

If you're female, this means EAT SPAGHETTI WHILE WEARING JEANS AND MAKING FACES IN THE MIRROR.

This Day In History:

--1760 George III ascends the British throne

--1854 The Light Brigade charges (Battle of Balaklava) (Crimean War) (Ma: nothing like a stirring poem to make war seem good. If you have a hankering to hear Tennyson himself reciting the poem on a wax cylinder recording, click here)

--1900 England annexes Transvaal (yes, the Transvaal was a long way from England, but there was 'gold in them thar hills' fer cryin,' out loud)

--1955 The microwave oven was introduced by The Tappan Company

--1964 Viking Jim Marshall runs 66 yards in the wrong direction for a safety (ouch!)

--2007 Hoyt family of Iowa scheduled to get their second load of cement

Ma's quote of the day:

"Where the press is free and every man able to read, all is safe."

-- Thomas Jefferson
 

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Ma's Political Wrap-up

Seeing as Iowa is practically the nexus of early presidential campaign activity, it would be most behoovin' to make mention of recent comments, actions or intentions regarding the candidates or even non-candidates.

Taken from this week's headlines:

--Castro is claiming President Bush could spark WWIII

--President Bush claims Iran could spark WWIII if they get nuclear weapons

Is it just me? Or is there triangulation going on?
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--Yankee fan Giuliani is backing the Red Sox

--Senator Dodd talks up his white hair in a recent ad

Finally...some substance.
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--McCain says he would shoot Bin Ladin himself

--Romney can do powerpoint presentations

--Bob Jones University likes Romney

Not sure why Bob Jones U. chose Romney over McCain, but maybe it's because Romney used the word "Caliphate" correctly in the sentence of an ad.....OR, perhaps BJU is sneakily trying to undermine Romney by endorsing him.

It's so hard to tell, sometimes.
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Ma the intrepid reporter has noticed more than one or two VERY LARGE signs for Ron Paul while she's been driving hundreds of miles through Iowa these past weeks.

We do not know exactly what this means, we only report the facts.
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In totally unpolitical and uninteresting news, today is the second day of the 11-day Idiot Proof Diet.

Today's weight-loss: half a pound.

It's only 10:00 and already I've had two helpings of carbs. Ma, you CHEATER!

Like I said, this is probably the kids' fault. No wait...make that Loren's fault, ha ha :-)

There. I feel better now, expect for being dizzy from craning my neck during the screeding process yesterday afternoon.

Ma's advice for the day: Don't be like me.
 

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The Great Cement Caper

After two disappointing postponements due to wet weather, Loren was finally able to schedule the cement truck for this afternoon.

But before that, I had to run Derek over to Hampton to get fitted up with a Holter monitor. The amazing University of Iowa Children's Hospital had run out, yesterday, so I had to do some running out of my own, today. Then Derek got to work in cement wearing the 24 hour monitor-of-doom.

With tools and boots assembled, the Hoyt family anxiously waited for the big moment...

The cement truck is here...THE CEMENT TRUCK IS HERE !!!


The first cement comes down the chute...
(see all that rebar? Loren was drilling and putting those babies in for more than a week)

There is work for almost everyone. Melinda and Carolyn start the screeding process.
(You just have to wonder how the word "screed" came about. I'm picturing a bunch of rough characters sitting around after a long day smoothing concrete....one guy flips and coin and says, "Alright then...it's all settled. 'Heads' we call it 'screeding,' 'Tails' we call it 'ballet.')

A boy...in boots...in cement. It's a dream come true.


Nolan even wanted to help. I was shocked.


It's enough for Trevor just to gaze upon the monolith's beauty. Hmmmm...
...can you be a cement truck when you grow up?

All the first sections are basically done.
It was VERY tiring work, but now we know better how to handle things for the next time.

We'll let this harden for a bit and then get another load delivered. It may take four or five loads to get the entire garage floor finished.

I predict Loren will sleep very well tonight.

This is a sampling of the pictures I took today. I'll add these and more to the Picasa House Reno Album in a few days.
 

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Hols of the Day

I would just like to say from the outset that I hope anything presented here will be factually accurate. But let's face it...you get what you pay for.

Today is:

National Mole Day! Time to explore our chemical side.

You have until 6:02 this evening to celebrate.

This date in history:

--1679 Meal Tub Plot against James II of England (really confusing)
--1915 1st national horseshoe throwing championship, Kellerton, Iowa

(let's hear it for Iowa! We're SO much more than corn)

--1915 25,000 women march in NYC, demanding right to vote
--1941 Walt Disney's "Dumbo" released
--1944 Soviet army invades Hungary
--1981 US national debt hits $1 trillion
--2007 Ma Hoyt experiences deep regret for not making the Arby's manager fix another sub for her son. Another example of submission run amok.

Religious History-- 4004 (BC) According to the sacred time line worked out by Archbishop James Ussher, 73, "the heavens and the earth" were created on this date at 9:00 a.m. GMT.

I'm sorry..."the heavens and the earth" were created on this date at 9:00 a.m. GMT."...I just thought that worthy of an extreme giggle.

Ma's quote of the day:

"Puritanism -- The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy."

-- H. L. Mencken
 

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The Fun of Sitting...

...and other medical pursuits.

Took ol' Derek down for another check-up with the good Doctor L. in Iowa City. Boy oh boy...there is nothing like sitting for 8 hours. Five while driving and three in clinic-of-evil-waiting.

Good check-up, though. Six months post cardioversion, Derek is still staying out of his atrial fibrillation. The doc said the Sotalol is working better than he'd hoped :-) All we need is one more Holtor monitor reading and if that shows nothing significant, Derek can come off the rat poison...er, I mean Coumadin (Warfarin) and go to a daily baby aspirin.

This will open up a whole new world for Derek, such as getting his wisdom teeth extracted.

Yes, it just keeps getting better.

Ma was plenteous tired after meager sleep. Trouble was, Loren also had meager sleep last night so there was a change of plans and I drove Derek to his appointment. It seems I still out-pace Loren in adrenaline-get-through-it-ness while immersed in sleep-deprived meagerness.

These are the kinds of victories one can only dream about, which incidentally was related to today's driving experience. I was forced to employ stay awake techniques such as pinching my earlobes (pain=alertness) and playing dodge-ums with the semis.

Stopping for a late lunch at the Waterloo Arby's is also helpful.

Behold...the toasted sub of doom which Derek ordered.

After the ceremonial unwrapping we observed its dark demeanor. I took it back up to the counter and queried, "Ummm...is it supposed to look like this?"

The young lady looked over at the manager for quick bit of mental telepathy advice but it was not necessary as he confidently replied, "Oh, that's just how they turn out. He won't even taste it. That's normal. But if you want, we can make another one..."

I managed to keep some of my utter disbelief out of the "Yeah, right" look I tossed over my shoulder as I stupidly went back to our table.

It had taken them long enough to burn the first one...I wasn't about to wait for another reject or argue with such recent transfers from an alternate universe.

I would just like to repeat that this was the WATERLOO ARBY'S and yes, they burn the subs.

Oh...and while I'm on a roll here, the folks at Waterloo's Super Wal-Mart might want to reconsider the adhesive they're using to put those little stickers on the apples. I literally had to cut them out of the fruit this evening.

I will be SO happy to grocery shop at my wonderful Iowa Falls Fareway next week. Not only can you peel the stickers right off the apples, but they usually have blueberry bagels for 99 cents per bag of five.

Ma-the-consumer-advocate, strikes again.

Time for bed. It's been a long day. Nothing like topping off the evening of a cardiology appointment by watching the last segment of The Heart on PBS.

Naturally, we had ice cream afterwards.

This is Big Bad Whinin' Ma, over and out.
 

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(interactive) Ma Joke #4

Three families walked into a huge convention hall housing two fairs: one a homeschool curriculum fair and the other an information technology show.

Between them all there were an assortment of 13 children, ranging in age from newborn to a 16-year-old who was doing college level academic work.

The Ma's convinced their husbands to watch the kids for a few minutes while they visited the restroom, after which they ducked out the back door and went out for dinner and to see the movie Gone With the Wind.

When they got back to the convention hall they found all of their loved ones sitting happily in front of a wide screen plasma TV that the husbands had won for having the best behaved children.

Question: Why could this never happen in a million-gazillion years?

(hint: may be more than one answer)
 

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The New, Blue Screen of Death

 


Never seen this one before. I have a suspicion that Firefox does this so that it can install new updates. And then, after it has installed the new updates (after you've shut down and restarted your computer again), then, THEN you no longer get the option to restart the "session" that was shut down unexpectedly.

That means no more happy holiday tabs and no more saved news stories for a "Newsy Nuggets" post.

"Call your hardware vendor for support."

Oh LOOORRRRR--en.....
 

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One Family's Flu-shot Saga

Dateline: October 18, 2007

What what left of the Hoyt family--recently decimated by two collegiates leaving home--loaded up in the awesome white 15 passenger van and headed off for their local health clinic.

While they no longer needed all the available passenger seating, the extra space would well come in handy for accommodating any prone bodies post-shotage.

After a twenty-five minute drive on rainy roads amidst the trauma of a one-speed wind-shield wiper system, the targeted destination was achieved and van-disembarkment ensued.

Upon entering the building of doom, the children acquired comfortable seating while the unselfish Mr. and Mrs. Hoyt remained at the desk filling out reams of paperwork. The meek and lowly mother fished out the 12 health insurance cards--one for each child, two different organizations--from her trendy and cavernous Liz Claiborne "Don't-worry,-I-bought-it-at-Goodwill" purse.

Becoming slightly confused at the paper-signing, the "It's-amazing-I'm-as-normal-as-I-am" maman received helpful comments from her spouse pertaining to her ability to adequately decipher words on the printed page.

As this paperwork drama was unfolding, eight-year-old future thespian Nolan felt led to demonstrate his feelings concerning the oncoming medical encounter...
"Élan is my life ! he was heard to shout softly.

Oblivious to their surroundings, two high-school students worked diligently at their Marine Biology and Algebra 2 courses.


Ever mindful of his own personal health responsibilities, young Trevor-me-lad downed copious amounts of H2O from the neato-keeno Culligan machine in an effort to stave off dehydration.


After a mere 30 minute wait the Hoyt family was taken back to the room-of-hypodermic-evil en masse, during which time they created quite a sensation both from their vast numbers as well as the usual "Aw...look-at-the-cute-little-kids!" comments.

*sigh*

The ever brave and ever humble mother volunteered to go first, followed shortly by the father. From there it was on to los kiddos, several of which declined to be photographed for blatant familial exploitation.

Looking slightly less enthusiastic, Nolan nevertheless did not cry out upon puncture.


Ethan the stout-hearted, laughing in the face of danger.


"Nary a peep!" was the nurse's acclamation when the family of eight burst from the small claustrophobic examination room.

And as the courageous family drove off in their global warming-inducing vehicle, the young Trevor was heard to exclaim,

"Welw...we won't have to do THAT again for a wong time!"

A visit to the grocery store followed with cookie rewards handed out all around.

The following morning brought relief from aching arms as well as another chance to glimpse the really cool band-aid.


Bon chance! O Hoyt-sters.

We wish ye well.
 

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Surprise, Surprise

If I had one of those talking scales it would have said the following this morning:

"Congratulations. You have now gained six pounds. What is your problem, anyway?"

I'll tell you what my problem is...

• It's fall and I have this overwhelming urge to eat carbs in preparation for a cold winter.
  
• It's fall and I don't have to mow the lawn as much, so I don't get nearly the amount of exercise I used to. I do burn some calories trying to start a mower which has problems in cool weather. What I really need to do is go out and spent an hour each day pulling the rip cord.
  
• It's fall and since homeschooling has resumed I am doing more sitting and reading/listening to their studies, etc.
  
• There are children in the home and because I cook for them and not just my husband and myself there are more things hanging around the kitchen, begging to be eaten up. This was proven beyond a shadow of a doubt when Loren and I were up at Mayo for three months and I lost 10 pounds without even trying.
  
• For every food you give up, another food will raise it's ugly calorie-laden head to tempt you. I successfully gave up Dove's chocolates and diet pop/soda/carbonated beverages. Now I can actually hear hot-buttered cinnamon toast calling me by name.
  
• I'm pretty sure that if the Yankees had gotten into the ALCS playoffs, none of this would have happened.
  
• Basically, besides problems inherent with the changing seasons, this is something I've struggled with most of my adult life and I'll just have to deal with it.
  

Coming soon: dramatic shots of the flu serum experience from yesterday :-)
 

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Things to Make You Feel Bad

Having that "Back in School" dream. Again. Only this time it wasn't college but high school.

But that wasn't the worst of it. One of my nephews was my teacher. My GYM teacher, no less. (yes, that's what we called Phys Ed back then...and suddenly all those locker room smells are coming back...)

Not sure how I did in the class because I spent my ENTIRE DREAM TIME lost in the building, looking for the restroom.

I think there are some obvious lessons we can learn from this dream:

1) Young whippersnappers should never be in charge of their elders
2) They just don't make buildings with enough restrooms for women
3) Ma is obviously suffering from post-traumatic stress syndrome from her school days

But let's face it...dreams are not terribly meaningful. They're just your brain's way of making you look stupid while you sleep.

Let's move on to truly important things, like how one should dress for the Family Research Council Value Voters Summit.

Thanks to Paul Bedard's "Washington Whipers" in U.S. News & World Report for this little nugget:

---- Men: Khakis, button-down shirt and sport jackets are a great look. Black/navy/dark gray suits give you a professional-looking edge. At the very least wear a long sleeve solid color button-down shirt.

---- Women: Anything professional-looking will work for ladies--suits, skirts, nice pants, colors, solids, patterns. Just keep it modest--don't commit a Jeri Thompson-esq faux pas by dressing for Hollywood or Miami.

---- Both: Scent is not a part of dressing professionally. In this town, janitors and 20-somethings going to clubs wear cologne and perfume; professionals do not.

This is the advice from a political support blog for Huckabee, specifically, this post.

It's not my intention to promote or not promote anyone for president (at least not at this time, though my present disinclination to advance/not advance any one candidate does not preclude the possibility of such activity in the future, should I feel/not feel like it) but I would rather draw attention to the last notation:

Scent is not a part of dressing professionally. In this town, janitors and 20-somethings going to clubs wear cologne and perfume; professionals do not.

Of course the town "Mrs. Smith" is referring to is Washington D.C. But don't worry, even though "Mrs. Smith" moved to the capitol city and went to law school, she married a public school teacher which "keeps her connected to Main Street." (see her sidebar, "A Lobbyist For Main Street?!?)

But as a janitor, nay, even a professional janitor, I take umbrage...oh yes, I take GREAT umbrage to the smear upon my name.

I resent being linked in the same sentence to "20-somethings going to clubs."

We janitors are a respectable lot and if I want to wear perfume to church on Sunday then I jolly well will wear perfume to church on Sunday.

After all, I'm around me more than anyone else and a discreet squirt of Vanilla Fields could mean the difference between a returned smile or the sudden clunk-over of someone due to an unfortunate deodorant malfunction on my part.

LIVES could be at stake.

But let us not limit ourselves to the whims of Ma's personal feelings. Let's get down to the nitty-gritty of what words mean.

The word "janitor" comes from a noble Latin background. Let us examine the history behind the word:

Word History: A holiday for janitors ought to take place in January, for both words are linked. In Latin iānus was the word for "archway, gateway, or covered passage" and also for the god of gates, doorways, and beginnings in general. As many schoolchildren know, our month January—a month of beginnings—is named for the god. Latin iānitor, the source of our word janitor and ultimately also from iānus, meant "doorkeeper or gatekeeper." Probably because iānitor was common in Latin records and documents, it was adopted into English, first being recorded in the sense "doorkeeper" around 1567 in a Scots text. In an early quotation Saint Peter is called "the Janitor of heaven." The term can still mean "doorkeeper," but in Scots usage janitor also referred to a minor school official. Apparently this position at times involved maintenance duties and doorkeeping, and the maintenance duties took over the more exalted tasks, giving us the position of janitor as we know it today.

Hmmm. Saint Peter is called "the Janitor of heaven." I kinda like that.

While it might be that "Mrs. Smith" intended no slur on janitors per se, it does seem clear that she was attempting to make unfavorable comparisons and one would certainly hope that she does appreciate the folks who dump her Evian empties out of her waste basket and sweep up after hours so that her professional looking suits--in colors, solids and patterns--don't acquire any très gauche grit.

But it does my heart good to know that "Mrs. Smith" has been hanging out with janitors, otherwise how would she have the precise knowledge to make said comparison?

So here's to the high powered lobbyists who spring from the countryside and gallantly brave the professional world of Washington so as to speak for the values of us poor hicks...er, I mean Americans.

And thanks for remaining your sweet simple selves.
 

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The Great Applesauce Endeavor, Stage 1

Time: October 15th, 9:30am start
Participants: Ma Hoyt and the following slaves: Mystery Guest, Derek, Melinda, Carolyn, Ethan, Nolan and Trevor.

With the glad promise of minimal school, the kids have gathered 'round the kitchen table for a day of applesauce production.
The cutting begins as Trevor--still in pajamas--waits for the sign to open the bag of sugar..."Not yet, Trevor."

Derek wasn't in the picture yet because he had to go get his pro-time. (Oh sure...like THAT's an excuse)

You have to have reached a certain age of dependability before Ma will entrust you with a knife. Ethan, almost eleven, has been halving apples for a couple of years, despite being left-handed.
And what is this? A cameo appearance by Kendra! She had zipped in for a long weekend during her Fall Break. It was only the merest of coincidences that this coincided with applesauce day :-D ("No, not yet, Trevor")

Finally dressed, the wee lad goes out to the addition to load up more apples for washing.
These two boxes were each approximately half-filled with Red Delicious from 2.5 apple trees (one of the three is dying)

Once the four pans were filled and bubbling, the apple cutters got their first break of the day.
That blue rag is one of my most important tools. I wipe the stove almost constantly. I learned a hard lesson at the end of the day years ago when trying to clean off cooked-on glops and drips of apple bits. Clean-as-you-go, baby. CLEAN-AS-YOU-GO.

Hey...I may not be the best of housekeepers but applesauce-stove-wiping is one area in which I excel.

OOOoooo! Time to put in the sugar :-) Uhhh...what are those finger-sized dips in the sugar, guys?


Trevor-the-bonny-wee-lad stirs in the sweetener.
He prefers the Spin-the-Spoon method.

("C'mon Treovr...pick up the pace")

Once the finished sauce has cooled it's time to start filling up freezer containers.
(Try not to spill, Nolan....)

Trevor gets the prize for volunteering the most times to take out squished apple peels to the now flattened compost pile. "Awoh you 'bout done Mommy? It's chillwy out hewoh..."


Trevor takes his turn at "dipping," as he calls it.
In the background you can see Kendra processing the cooked apple mush through the sieve. (thought I had a better picture of this...)

We ate lunch in shifts so as not to shut down production. (poor Loren was shunted to the rec room for his meal) As the afternoon rolled on we became ever more efficient. Kendra ended up working the ricer full-time which meant that the apple cutters never got far enough ahead to take any more breaks.

MWAH, HA, HAH!

By 3:00 they were practically BEGGING me to do school, instead.

The ceremonial washing of the final apple! Most of them were bigger than this one.


By 4:00 the last apple was cut and the kids stumbled off to soak their hands in Epsom Salts. Kendra finished running the mash through at 4:30 and even though I washed each pan and bowl as it became free, it took me until 5:00 to complete cleanup.

Here it be...results of all the Red Delicious apples.
It made approximately 78 quarts :-)

In about two weeks or so we'll start on stage 2, apples from the "little" tree. It's a Dwarf Wealthy variety but produces almost as much the other three combined.

I finally got the remaining sauce into the freezer on the second evening and it's still not frozen.

Great crop, though.

But I am requesting prayer for the ice cream...
 

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