One Last Day

Finally. I thought this year would never END!

We've got an eclectic mix for today's post:

1) Ma is getting psychologically prepared for the Big Diet Endeavor, which will not commence until after the 4th. That's the day I have to take Derek and Carolyn down to University of Iowa Children's Hospital for their cardiology check-ups, and ain't no way I'm doin' that without my usual driving crutch: hot spicy chips and Diet Coke to stay alert.

I had vague intentions to lose weight, but now that I hold an office in the Jason Hoyt Fan Club (Facebook), it is incumbent of me to set a good example, and not bring shame to our fearless leader, Mr. Awesome.

2) In other news, my Master Gardener Mojo is already starting to pay off. I received a letter from the Arbor Day Foundation, offering me several gifts if I donated as little as 10 dollars and filled out a survey.

Well you betcha!

My gifts are as follows:

10 spruce trees (I'll have to break this to Loren, later)
1 scented purple lilac (been wantin' one for many moons)
...something...(I don't remember exactly, but I'm pretty sure it's not alive, or maybe it's a pony...I don't know....)

And for the first 50 responders, FREE COFFEE FOR A YEAR!

I did wait several days to open the letter, so large amounts of liquid caffeine may not be in my future, but I think the other loot stuff is well worth it.

PLUS, 11 address labels with my very own name on them! I do mean MY name and my name ALONE. And purdy stickers!

That should get me through the winter.

3) Now, for your cartoon enjoyment:

Ma's Doonesbury laugh for the day. You must see it :-D (the views expressed in the cartoon are not necessarily those of Loren, but they are so appropriate, on so many levels)

4) Now for some humorous quotes, fresh from the Hoytstead. These are all accurate in wording and most characteristic of the individuals cited. Our thanks go to Sharon, for compiling and sharing these selections which may come to haunt certain people, one day.

Happy New Year's Eve, everyone. Ma raises an imaginary glass to those celebrating in Cedar Rapids.
 

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Jason, now 22

Wow, what a bunch of old kids we have. Four people in their 20's.

Luckily, I'm still young and fresh, myself.

Two lovely raisin cream pies, created by Sharon.


Carolyn is slicing the tortilla roll-ups, for which she was responsible.


TWO pans of Mexican chicken...


...and applesauce.


It was decided that punching 22 candles into all that beautiful meringue would not be aesthetically pleasing.


Oops, bad focusing on Ma's part. Geek T-shirts are always a good bet though...
...and I believe this is binary for "Geek."

Oh look...ANOTHER T-shirt!


A book for every aspiring dictator, How to Rule the World.


One of the few times this year we've celebrated a birthday on the correct date.

Jason and Sharon are both leaving tomorrow, so we were glad to work in another birthday feast.

Happy Birthday Jason! (a.k.a. Mr. Awesome)
 

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Un Autre Adolescent

That's French for, "counting down until they leave home," ha ha.

Before we have another auspicious birthday at the Hoytstead, we need to catch up on Ethan's 13th!

Ethan's real birthday was December 17th, but he chose to celebrate on the 23rd, when more of the older kids would be at home.

He's just humble, that way.

So, without further ado, we present the newest Hoyt teenager...Ethan, now 13 years old.

The blowing of the candles.
Ethan chose a Texas sheet cake, baked in rounds, and frosted with ganache.

Because the conventional way would be too boring. In Hoytland, it's not right unless you've fiddled with the recipe or added extra pipes....or something.

First present: an exciting Matt Christopher SPORTS COMBO!!
C'mon, Ethan...look excited. Beggars who shop at Goodwill can't be that choosy.

Oh boy...the "Charlie" books. The Chocolate Factory and The Glass Elevtaor


And now, a selection of screwdrivers.
Let the dismantling begin!

Ethan's birthday meal: Lasagna, deviled eggs and fruit salad, which included grapes that had quadrupled in price since summer.

He had asked for lasagna AND cocktail smokies, but I said that was too much meat. For a while there were heavy negotiations concerning meatless lasagna and the smokies, but this seemed to denigrate the essential qualities of lasagna in Ethan's eyes, so he gave up his birthday dream of small oblong pseudo protein floating in a strange sauce.

It doesn't seem possible that the 3rd youngest is a teenager.

Happy birthday, Ethan!
 

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LOTRS

This stands for "Lord of the Ring Sausage," though technically, Ethan is cooking up sausage links for supper. This involves watching Jason play a computer game and running downstairs every so often to turn them after dispersing the smoking oil.

Let's just say...they're well done.
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Went shopping today and cashed in my gift card from Sharon...I'VE GOT MY SLIPPERS!

They are SO comfy. I'm sure my life will turn around as a result. Already I see nothing but blue skies, good times, and huge revenues from a book which I have yet to write, on a subject not yet chosen.

And all because of relaxation-appropriate foot-shodding.

Also today--thanks to Loren--the official procurage of new calendars. Let's hear it for bank perkage, not to mention the "age" suffix!

And exclamation marks...we love them! Too!

OK...it's barely possible that Ma is a little hopped up on sugar.

Viva los holidays!

(down girl, DOWN)
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On a less exclamatory note, I might take Carolyn in to the local clinic for a 12-lead EKG, tomorrow. She's been having some heart rhythm irregularities since the night of the 23rd. After talking to the good folks in Iowa City, I got an order for said test tomorrow. Hopefully (I guess) she'll still have something weird to record. One hates to take time out for these things and not have anything show up, as in, "It's that over-protective Hoyt woman claiming her child's out of rhythm, again..."

In other news, we've started the famous mid-semester showing of Lord of the Rings. Tonight will be the second in the trilogy. Carolyn gets to watch it for the first time!

Ahhh....darkened room, surround sound, blankets and couches, and DVD goodness :-)
 

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Christmas Day 2009

Christmas Greetings to all, albeit a tad late.

We've been having mucho funno here at the Hoytstead and Ma did not feel like spending lots of time in front of the computer.

Following are pictures of Christmas morning, after the obligatory eating, dressing and brushing of tooths.

In other words, we didn't get started until at least 10.

As always, click on pictures to enlarge.

Even before presents, Jason whipped up his promised coffee cake for a special breakfast


Sharon, with a CD of folk songs from Paris.


Loren gets a Menard's gift card, camouflaged in an empty box of chocolate covered cherries.


It's a 3-D puzzle of Godzilla, Trevor's hero!


Ethan dubiously surveys the cover of The Dangerous Book for Boys.


Oh joy! More in the Lemony Snicket series, for Carolyn.
(Ma cleverly farmed out different 3-book sets amongst the older siblings, so that Carolyn now has all 13 books :-)

Noble Prize Women in Science, for Melinda (no pressure now, dear...)


Derek gazes upon a CD by Yo-Yo Ma, Simply Baroque.



Ma relied heavily on books and CD's, as evidenced by Kendra's Fantasia on a Theme by Thomas Tallis, by Ralph Vaughan Williams.


Ma thought Jason might find How to Survive a Robot Uprising, useful.


Newlyweds Ardith and Justin, received A Night of Two Stars...a Bob and Ray 2 CD set.
Bob and Ray are satirists from the "old days." Ma used to see them occasionally on Johnny Carson.

Ma was ecstatic to get this set of poetry books from Kendra...Browning, Dickinson, Longfellow and Whitman.
It comes all the way from Canada and the Shakespeare festival. Thank you, Kendra!

A combo present from Ardith and Justin to the three youngest boys...
...a car racing set! It has proven to be VERY popular. Justin only had to fix it once, so far...

This is a sampling. There were other presents, but I figured we couldn't put them ALL up! But if you want to be fair to this size of a family, you have to post one for each person.

I will say this, however...Ma is looking forward--time to be decided later--on using her gift card from Justin and Ardith for Half Price books!! Naturally, this will necessitate a trip to Cedar Rapids and an overnight stay, to do things up right :-D

WOO HOO!
 

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Sorry for No Posting...

...but we have been having so much fun!

Presents and a largish meal, on Friday.

Talking and laughing and watching movies.

Sharon taught a new form for Uno.

Much multiplayer gaming with X-pilot.

Ma's necessary nappage.

Pictures to come and more regular updating, soon.
 

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"Here's to Bill"

Our UPS man.

Bless his heart, we torment that fellow continually, ordering packages that come in dribs and drabs, forcing him to make the long trek to the country on a regular basis.

And by "we," I mean Loren, of course.

I only order stuff around November (Christmas) and June (2-3 months before a new school year). And most of my stuff comes by the USPO.

At any rate, the roads have deteriorated and our-man-at-UPS (Bill), a supremely nice fellow, called to say he cannot deliver out this way anymore, tonight, the roads are just too bad. He's leaving our package at Casey's and we should (I think) be able to get in tomorrow, to collect it.

I'd much rather do that then have him get hurt.

And speaking of storms, there has been no light flickering, so far. Usually, prolonged flickering denotes an upcoming power outage. Lots more mixed precipitation to come, though....

Oh, and Sharon arrived safely, just after 4 o'clock, so that is good! It was getting slippery towards the very end, but otherwise, her trip was fine.

We did have to push her up to the garage, however. Her car got stuck coming around the driveway turn, but four siblings went out and helped her get the Mighty White Honda Civic into the garage and safety.

Now, I'm just cooling my heels while the multitude-of-kiddage works on Ethan's birthday supper...so yes, once or twice a year this whole big family thing pays off.
 

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The Christmas Storm Report - Day 1

Howdy folks! Ma Hoyt reporting, direct from the heartland of Iowa, nestled deep within the heartland of America.

The important thing here is that we have heart. Anyway, thought you might want an update on the ol' weather:

The temperature is 31 degrees, winds are at 20 mph and the barometer is at 29.63, having fallen slightly from last night. There are still fine bits of rain falling. Roads are not bad at all, discovered because...

...Loren had to take Derek in for his pro-time this morning. Kendra had glimpsed them traveling down the road in the great white van and I thought this was a LITTLE strange, particularly as Moby Dick had not started on Monday when we REALLY needed it. But I forgot this perplexity until Loren called from the clinic, "...oh, and I'm going to need someone to dig out my car. I got it stuck trying to get out of the drive and had to take the van..."

ARGH. We just dug that driveway out yesterday, but it blew shut overnight.

Ma got a crew together and despite the wind, we got 'er done!
(Carolyn, Jason, Ethan and Kendra)


I did help with the shoveling, but first, the ever important job of recording current weather conditions....
(nice job NOT focusing on the branch, Ma. Oh well, you can see the freezing drizzle had accumulated to around 1/2 inch)

An ice laden evergreen does a bit of shoveling


First broken branch...one on Mr. Lupkes' property.


Last summer's Rudbeckia stems, encased in the frozen stuff.


Preparing for potential power problems, I've put a batch of bread in the oven and cooked up hard-boiled eggs for Ethan's birthday dinner, tonight. I guess if we lose electricity and can't bake the lasagna or cake, we can always stick candles in the deviled eggs :-)

Stay tuned for more weather updates,

This is Ma Hoyt,

Roger and ou...
 

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Couch and Book Wallowing

Day 2 of the Hoytsters' Christmas vacation. Ma looks in at the quiet living room and detects...
...Nolan and Trevor, startled out of their Charlie Brown and Puzzle search reverie. Jason, not so much. But he's had hard day of appointments and whipping younger siblings to shreds in computer games.

Kendra has claimed the entire love seat for herself, and Ethan is engrossed with Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH, after watching the video earlier in the afternoon.
Derek, home after a non-stop-hardworking semester, relaxes by....um...working on German.

Melinda finally has time to read what she wishes, thanks to vacation and a recent trip to the libraries.


The evening will be topped off with carols 'round the couches, another chapter from The Best Christmas Pageant Ever, and perhaps...a small quaff of eggnog.
 

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Presents are in the Can!

Or rather, the cardboard box in the closet.

Wrapping Christmas presents doesn't take all that long when you only give one per child, ha, ha.

How well I remember the days right after Loren's transplant...he was still in the hospital and I was frantically getting prepared to move up there for 3 months. One night, after the kids went to bed, I spend three hours wrapping all the Christmas, as well as birthday presents for Carolyn, Melinda, Ethan and Jason. I don't know that it involved large quantities of gifts, so much as trying to concentrate on what I was doing with a gazillion details running through my brain. That's when I started taking Benadryl to sleep at night...but I'm off it now, baby! My only drug of choice is chocolate and, well...just food in general.

I was scrambling for a few minutes this afternoon, though. I KNEW I had a certain something stashed back in the closet for someone's birthday....and I could not find it.

Until I got to my very last shipping box. THAT was close.

In other news, Sharon called and said she'll be driving out tomorrow instead of this afternoon and evening. She was tired and needed the rest. And since the weather could be quite a mixture tomorrow, we would appreciate your prayers for her safe travel.

Don't know if Ardith and Justin will make it up by the 24th, but changing the weather is never as easy as switching brands of chocolate.
 

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Just a few library books...

 



MWAH HAH, HAH HAH, Hah!

Our little excursion to hit two libraries and three stores with 8 kids didn't quite turn out as expected.

Particularly if you thought I was being literal.

First off, Moby Dick, the Great White Van, did not start. Even with a jump, it did nothing but make ominous clicking sounds, no doubt, in an attempt to communicate with other high profile vehicles.

I thinking our van put out a signal, and when it couldn't connect with any other 15-passenger vans in a 100 mile radius, it felt lonely and decided not to start. Even though it took us all to church yesterday, it decided not to start.

Don't tell me they aren't sentient.

So...the next possibility was to cram all 8 kids and Ma into Loren's Lincoln, but then it was decided that if a few people volunteered to to stay home, there would be less crammage.

THEN, Derek reminded me that there were only 7 kids at home...."oh yeah"....but in the end, Ethan and Carolyn both decided to stay home and the rest of us were not TOO stuffed.

There were two laundry baskets with books (one library) in the trunk, as well as 7 tote bags (another library), PLUS, there had to be room for all the groceries and supplies from Wal*Mart.

It was a little tight, but we made it. All the more remarkable when you realize that Ma missed BOTH OF HER NAPS.

Kids were holding groceries on their laps, but it wasn't too bad.

In the picture above, the library tape looks long because it was printing all the books twice, due to some glitch. But Trevor was pretty impressed and as I always say, we got our taxpayer's money out of the paper roll, and no one can take that away from us.

Jason was here by the time we arrived home....now to wait for Sharon tomorrow, and Ardith and Justin on the 24th or 25th, Weather permitting.

But the larder is stocked for Christmas, though I doubt that two quarts of eggnog will be enough...
 

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It's Official...

...the entire gang plans to be here on Christmas Day :-D

Weather and stuffs permitting, of course.

Man, I guess we will have to clean up, after all!

Should be mucho funno, though.
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I cut two boys hair, today. Two heads with very long hair. As in, whack off some with a scissors before you can even attempt a clippers with the longest length attachment.

And in the process, I discovered why Nolan seems so tall. He hasn't been rinsing the shampoo out of his long hair in a....*cough*....thorough manner, and there was about an inch or so of residue flaking off while I was cutting and combing and combing and...."OW!"...."Wow, Nolan, this is gross!"...and giving up combing his hair. I'm pretty sure that inch of flakage increased his height accordingly.

The kid needs a wire brush, is what he needs.
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Another project for today will be to fold more Christmas letters, this time for our church and for the church where I was janitor.

I'll probably need additional portions of eggnog, for strength. Wasn't it lucky I happened past an eggnog display while running into the grocery store last night? If this addiction keeps up, I may have to try the "light" version, though my principles would run toward authenticity of recipe over "not becoming more of a whale," but still...
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Loren and I went out for our "undate" last night and I think one detail stands out more than any other:

Every establishment in Cedar Falls, be it restaurant or theater, is too cold.

And it's mostly the level from the knees on down. If they're not going to heat their floors properly, they should at least provide lap robes for menopausal women.

I demand the right to eat fattening food and watch gloomy movies in a warm environment.
 

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Better late than never

A brief but boring update:

Loren got a printer running with a good cartridge and I printed off all the snail mail Christmas letters.

But before that, I sat down and hand addressed 77 envelopes. Talk about your hand cramps! Reminds me to be thankful for the computer and the ease it gives to communication. Speaking of which, very sorry to the wonderful nieces and nephews who will have to wait for their email editions...I feel have to draw the line at 4 books of stamps. Your parents (Loren and my siblings) will be getting a hard copy, however. After I think they've arrived, I'll post one online.

I still have more letters to print out for our church and some folks that attend the Reformed church down the road, but I can do that tomorrow.

All the letters were dropped in a mailbox this evening, but I think most will arrive by Wednesday or Thursday.

THAT'S A LOAD OFF MY MIND!

Tomorrow I need to cut two boys' hair and perhaps coax Kendra to start on the Christmas cookies.

And I should really get back on the treadmill, which brings up the important question,

"Can one walk and drink eggnog at the same time?"
 

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We Be Back

Ma traveled down Iowa City-way to meet up with Kendra's ride back from Indiana. Only had to hear Taylor Swift two times, so all in all, a pretty good drive.

While driving through Aplington, I bought all my Christmas stamps, so I guess tomorrow will be heavy duty printing, addressing and stuffing of envelopes.

Also purchased my very first 52 oz drink from Casey's General Store. In general, this means one has to stop two times in the next two hours. Generally. But it was worth it, once I figured out how to lift it with one hand.

Home again, home again, yakkity yak.

Supper consisted of BLT's and fruit salad à la bananas and canned stuff. It was something quick, not to mention the whole, "I'm-WAY-TOO-TIRED-to-cut-up-potatoes-for-corn-chowder" aspect.

Dessert was a nice big helping of Kendra's-"I-come-bearing-gifts" bag of peanut M&M's, as well as a couple of peanut butter-filled Dove's chocolates.

In other words, we're a walking ad for Glucerna.

It didn't take long for Ethan to be stretched out on the floor, after which we soon heard his most memorable quote,

"Mommy told me not to talk, Carolyn."

Another Festivus miracle.

And now, Kendra has coaxed me into the "singing Christmas songs before bed" routine, since we have Derek-the-Bass at home....before which, I must go commune with the tub.
 

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Good News!

Kendra will be coming back, tomorrow. Looks like we'll have to tidy up the joint.....enhhhhh....maybe not.

It'll be nice to have her back, though. Trevor is already getting himself pumped up for tickling.

And here's more....Derek got his grades online: All "A's" !! That's my boy. Now aren't you glad for all those hours I coached you with calculus? OK, that's not strictly correct. It was calculus and classical literature, ha, ha.

Alright. He did it himself. But I did teach him to read and helped pound math facts into his brain, so I am definitely safe up to the 3rd grade level.

On the Christmas letter front, I've been editing away, today. It's both fun and exasperating. Every time I think it's "done," I find more stuff to fix. It's a very cagey game, line-wise. Sometimes I have to write in a more informal style, just to keep within the paragraph's limit.

We should definitely curtail people's activities in the future, to make this yearly letter less tricky.

On the "undate" front, Loren and I are going to take a chance on Friday, since one of us has to pick up Kendra on Thursday. Another mitigating factor is that all the movies change over on Friday, and Loren doesn't want to see Invictus, which is playing this week (when a couple's political leanings change during marriage, it's always the movies that suffer, ha ha).

Invictus: Latin for "unconquerable," or "invincible."

Also a poem...

Invictus


Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

--William Ernest Henley--

Invictus!
 

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Three Days 'Til Vacation, Whoohee!

I'll still have to do some drill with Trevor, who's just started on his multiplication facts. And probably listen to him read, since he's finally taken off in that regard.

But other than that, I'll only have to clean up for company, put Kendra in charge of Christmas cookie baking, wrap the presents (the last of which was shipped today-YAY!) and have a birthday or two.

Also, there's that little matter of the Christmas letter: more editing and then printing and folding and addressing and mailing...but that shouldn't be too bad.
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In other news, Loren had another check-in with the orthopedist up at Mayo today. He still has some hip pain so he has to go back in one more month.

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Tonight is an Old Fashioned Christmas Sing in Allison, sponsored by our church. I'll be taking the kids to that.

And Thursday will be the day of Kendra's arrival. She has a ride to Iowa City, so either Loren or I will run down to get her and then it will seem like part of the old gang is here, anyway.

Supper calls. Baked oatmeal. It's good for when you have to go out to a church function and eat two hours early and even though some of the kids don't like it they can stock up on snacks at the carol sing.

Insert commas at your own discretion.
 

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Barn Nativity

Before Ethan loses the will to live, I'd better put up these photos from Friday night's live nativity at the Weikert barn. It was dark enough that not all my photos turned out, but here's a sampling:

Ethan, son numero threeo, was the narrator, and spoke from the second floor.
Against advice from his mother and two sisters, he jammed 4 or 5 pairs of socks on his feet--into his regular sized boots--thus insuring that his toes would be squished and numb by the end of the program. Ethan toasted up his feet by the Weikert's wall heater in the house, affording himself the opportunity to complain, "I was so busy with my feet, I didn't get to eat as many snacks as I'd planned..."

The price of fame, Ethan. The price of fame.

Rebekah DeFord did an EX-cellent job singing One Small Child. I don't know how she managed to play the guitar in those cold temps.
And husband Caleb was great in the submissive supportive role of flashlight and music holder.

"And lo, the angel of the Lord did appear..." In Nikes.
(I couldn't tell what the shoe brand was, but "Nikes" has a spiritual sorta ring...)

This was one of Ma's favorite parts...Pastor Jack and Sandy Ritsema singing "Born in a Barn" (I think). They done right good.
Ritsemas live right down the road from us. He's the pastor of Washington Reformed Church, where I was the janitor. On slow weekends I used to touch up his sermons instead of sweeping the office (just kidding, Pastor Jack!...for the most part...).

The angels, appearing to the shepherds from the back barn loft.


Ma's 3 1/2 angels, from front to back: Nolan, Trevor, Carolyn and Melinda.


It was pretty cold (4 degrees), but we survived. Plus, now I get to revise Ethan's part of the Christmas letter.
 

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Whew!

Sorry for no post yet today...er, yesterday, but Derek got word on Friday night that his ride was leaving a day earlier than planned, which was fine...we just had to do a little reconfiguring.

Since Loren hasn't slept well for two nights, and has to lead singing in the morning (I mean, later today), and I laugh in the face of driving by myself and listening to the radio, I left around 2pm and got back just before midnight.

Drove to Clarinda, IA and only got turned around twice! Pretty good for this ol' Ma.

I even got to hear ALL of Prairie Home Companion. :-) Loved every minute, especially the scat-sung, short version of The Nutcracker. Some day I'm gonna see that show in person!

But right now, maybe I'll go to bed...
 

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As the Sun Goes Down...

...I'm thankful the snow shoveling is done!

...supper is going to be terribly early, because,

...the Weikert's live nativity deal is tonight, and Ethan is the narrator. Lows in the single digits below zero, which could make the whole thing go more quickly...

...pictures tomorrow, of the above festivities

___________

Now, on an almost completely different--but not quite--subject, here's a YouTube video of an amazing 75-year-old grandma winning a Salsa competition in Spain:



I don't think the sun is goin' down for her, yet...
 

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Can You Die From Shoveling Snow?

I mean, someone like me.

The following account is a shameless ploy for sympathy, because let's face it, when you live with someone who's almost died from cardiac arrest, been shocked numerous times by his defibrillator, and then undergoes a heart transplant, it's really hard to gin up some compassion anything short of life-threatening.

I am happy to say that we did get enough shoveled in the driveway to get Loren's car out. Of course, the old blue van and the old red Toyota are also out there, free and clear, but the van probably needs to be jumped and the Toyota is not trustworthy.

But we should be able to drive one car, now!

There was substantial buildup in front of the garage, where both Lincolns were parked. Ethan went to work here...
...and we still have to do the part in the foreground of the picture.

(one of the reasons these cars weren't in the garage is because Loren had been putting on snow tires--in the garage, where it's warm--and when he got to the big white van, the VERY LAST TIRE couldn't be switched, so he had to dump oil on it and let it set. It was still setting in there during the blizzard, but that tire finally did loosen up and get changed.

Carolyn cleared out be-TWEEN the two cars, where a very large drift had been deposited.


I had Nolan and Trevor, who were under the mistaken impression they were outside to play, pick up large chunks I'd broken off from the drift.

Come on, Trevor....get back up and get a goin'!

We finally did get that big drift cleared from the drive.

Trevor showing his snow-clump-tossing form.



Trevor was a pretty good little worker, however, here's a snippet of typical conversation I had with "somebody else:"

"Can't we stop now?"

"No."

"But I'm tired !"

"I've been out here longer than you..."

"My TOES are cold..."

"I want to finish this drift and then you can go in. You expect to eat for free?"

(that last comment was completely lost on Nolan, but one tries)

But getting back to the important whiney stuff....I have not felt this bad since I dug out that crazy sewer ditch.

Didn't realize you can get nauseated from hard work. I hadn't been that cold outside, but became pretty freezy indoors, so right after lunch I crawled into bed, with heavy sweat pants, heavy sweater, and two pairs of socks, and I turned the electric blanket up to medium toasty. Then I pulled a thick afghan over top of everything, and that's when I got the shakes.

Bone rattling, freezy shakes. The kind you get after having a baby. The ol' breathing techniques did nothing. I tried warming up for almost 30 minutes and then it hit me...JUMP INTO THE TUB!

So I put in lots of hot water, and when that cooled down, I put in more, and when THAT cooled down, I drained part and put in MORE hot water. Then I crawled back into bed and snoozed.

Now, instead of feeling cold and sick, I'm nice and warm, but still feeling sick.

And my heels hurt.

And did I mention I feel sick?
 

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Back of the Blizzard

Heydey Ho, Ma Hoyt, here....reporting live, once again.

I say with certainty that this is a "live" report, despite narrowly escaping the encroaching frigidity of lowering temperatures.

Winds have died down to a more reasonable 26mph, but so has the thermometer. Now at a mere 6 degrees, the windchill stands at -17. Promising news from the barometer, though, which has risen from it's previous 29.09 to 29.36....whoo-ee!

Again garbed in the dawn's early layers, Ma stumps out for another looksee at snow conditions:

Ahhh, the driveway drift seems to have fattened. Mucho worko pour Ma and los kiddos.


A weak and impotent suns attempts to bring light to the unearthly scene...
...but this reporter is not fooled. She can still feel the sting of snow grains upon her freckled face. Her fingers do not appreciate having their gloves removed to unfasten the camera's lens cap.

As we gaze, once again, upon the northern side of the house,
the Poplar's drift has not backed down from the wind...nay, it has increased in size.

The road, too, now exhibits fingers of snow, creeping ominously across it's width...
...fortunate it be for Mr. Gravel Road, that this first storm has spent much time filling up the ditches. NEXT time it won't be so lucky...

Ma has been "Mean Mom" today, refusing to let her children play outside.

But tomorrow...tomorrow may be a different story, for that is when we shall play with the snow shovels,

MWAH, HAH HAH, HAH Hah!

This is Ma Hoyt, over and out.
 

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The Ma Report

Hello again! Ma Hoyt, here, reporting live, from Blizzard-land, with pictures that are only 2 hours old.

It took two pairs of gloves, an extra sweatshirt and sweatpants, thick sweater, headband, heavy coat and scarf, but Ma LAUGHS in the face of dangerous cold, as long as she doesn't stay out more than 15 minutes.

Upon exiting the house, Ma turns east toward the garage....
Ohhhh, tough luck! The Green Dragon Lady Lincoln appears to be somewhat submerged in the frozen white stuff. According to the yardstick, the drift is close to 4 feet at its highest point. How we pity the poor suckers who will have to shovel that.

Bravely, our heroine makes her way around the back of the garage, where she is hit with the full force of blizzard windage. She spies another drift...
...it includes her beloved Poplar tree, and according to the yardstick, is nearly 3 feet tall.

That should make a nice tunnel drift for los kiddos.

Traveling westward, our intrepid reporter ventures out into the road, where it appears....relatively clear. In fact, she considers calling the mailman and telling him, "Stop being a slacker! I am still waiting for the last Christmas present!"

Still, the wind doth blow, and the weather be wicked in appearance.
Perhaps Ma will wait an hour or two before hassling the local post office.

The driveway close to the road is clear.

Not so much, farther in.
Ma estimates a substantial section to be under 15 inches of the shoveling stuff.

With the circumference of the house attained, our fearless and unpaid newswoman heads for safety and warmth, indoors. Her fingers are hurting in a most ouchy way, made only more acute by the two youngest boys, oblivious to her pain and suffering, bickering selfishly as she makes her gasping entrance to the house of refuge.

But with the calm, cool demeanor of an experienced arbitrator, she cuts them short with, "We'll talk about this later !" and sticks her sore paws back in her mouth.

Tune in next time, when Ma ventures back out into the wilds of the Iowa wilderness to answer that burning question,

"Hey...where did you guys leave that baseball bat you forgot to bring in...?"
 

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